Inquire within!
But really, if your in or around the 98662 area and interested in Zen fellowship, I am too!
Jordan
Showing posts with label Why I am here. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Why I am here. Show all posts
6.9.08
ZaZen 98662
Inquire within!
But really, if your in or around the 98662 area and interested in Zen fellowship, I am too!
Jordan
8.7.08
Just do good
Sometimes something is so simple, we find it impossible to comprehend or understand.
We want to relate it to everything in our lives and we do, but in the process we overcomplicate things. Yes! Everything can be explained with complex algorithms or a whole lot of special jargon. And yes sometimes it takes all of that to get us to wrap our heads around the facts. But here it is, pure, simple, unrefined and unadulterated.
Just do good.
Volumes of confusing doctrine have been written about this subject. Everything outlining what is doing good to the ways to accomplish good, what is not good. The duality and non-duality of good. Blah blah blah. It goes on and on and on. It spans every religion and philosophy. This simple message. This simple instruction. This simple imperative. This simple key.
Just do good.
I thought about writing a whole lot more about this but it has already been done. I will undoubtedly write about it some more sometime. But that will likely be in the name of “just do good.”
Just do good
Jordan
We want to relate it to everything in our lives and we do, but in the process we overcomplicate things. Yes! Everything can be explained with complex algorithms or a whole lot of special jargon. And yes sometimes it takes all of that to get us to wrap our heads around the facts. But here it is, pure, simple, unrefined and unadulterated.
Just do good.
Volumes of confusing doctrine have been written about this subject. Everything outlining what is doing good to the ways to accomplish good, what is not good. The duality and non-duality of good. Blah blah blah. It goes on and on and on. It spans every religion and philosophy. This simple message. This simple instruction. This simple imperative. This simple key.
Just do good.
I thought about writing a whole lot more about this but it has already been done. I will undoubtedly write about it some more sometime. But that will likely be in the name of “just do good.”
Just do good
Jordan
4.1.07
What am I doing in Vancouver Washington?
Before I had even returned to Camp Pendleton I had begun looking for a place to share my practice with others. This turned out to be much more challenging then I had thought it would be. Or at least I had made it a challenge. Finding the correct Sangha (for me) would turn out to be a challenge for me for over a year. This was complicated shortly after my return “stateside,” by a permanent change of station from Camp Pendleton, California to inspector instructor duty in Portland, Oregon.
Further complications had me traveling around the country to visit several remote sites around the country. It was during this time that I came across Brad Warner’s Hardcore Zen. While my “view” of Brad has changed over time, it was his book that really got me serious about putting myself on a cushion. His book said a lot of the same things I had already been familiar with from reading Master Dogen, and Master Uchyama’s Works, but the “punk rock” angle seemed to be a scalpel to pierce my own thick skull. My practice went from trying to sit for 20 or 30 minutes a day when I had time and was not to drunk, to the eventual cessation from alcohol all together and sitting at least an hour a day, morning and night regularly.
Moving to the Pacific North West, I found a several “Zen Centers” and found flaws that I could not seem to bend my ego around. I went to quite a few “introductions to Zen Meditation" classes just seeking the right place, only to find out things that disturbed me later. For example one center had a “membership Level” that depended not on the level of your practice but the measure of your monetary contribution to the center. Another had a class who’s “Soto Zen Priest and monk” was not familiar with Master Dogen’s Work, even pronouncing the masters name as “Dojen.” I found this a bit outrageous at the time. Persevering had benefits, and I found a place to practice (that almost seems perfect {for Me.})
Be well and Happy!
Gassho,
Jordan
Further complications had me traveling around the country to visit several remote sites around the country. It was during this time that I came across Brad Warner’s Hardcore Zen. While my “view” of Brad has changed over time, it was his book that really got me serious about putting myself on a cushion. His book said a lot of the same things I had already been familiar with from reading Master Dogen, and Master Uchyama’s Works, but the “punk rock” angle seemed to be a scalpel to pierce my own thick skull. My practice went from trying to sit for 20 or 30 minutes a day when I had time and was not to drunk, to the eventual cessation from alcohol all together and sitting at least an hour a day, morning and night regularly.
Moving to the Pacific North West, I found a several “Zen Centers” and found flaws that I could not seem to bend my ego around. I went to quite a few “introductions to Zen Meditation" classes just seeking the right place, only to find out things that disturbed me later. For example one center had a “membership Level” that depended not on the level of your practice but the measure of your monetary contribution to the center. Another had a class who’s “Soto Zen Priest and monk” was not familiar with Master Dogen’s Work, even pronouncing the masters name as “Dojen.” I found this a bit outrageous at the time. Persevering had benefits, and I found a place to practice (that almost seems perfect {for Me.})
Be well and Happy!
Gassho,
Jordan
27.12.06
Coming Home
Leaving Iraq through Kuwait, then a harrowing helicopter ride back to the “Boat” felt surreal to me. I was still far from letting go of attachment to desire. After a quick stop in Diego Garcia we were off to Australia. We spent a few days in Cairns and then made for Hawaii. I felt as if I was living a dream as we left Hawaii and headed home.
A ride on a landing craft to the beach at Camp Pendleton and a buss ride back to the Headquarters building seemed to take an eternity. When I got off the bus I could not see my family, I ran through the building, around the building until finally I found them.
Meeting my Wife and children,
One for the first time.
After six months deployed.
Places some would describe as hell.
Peace, Joy.
Be well and happy!
Jordan
A ride on a landing craft to the beach at Camp Pendleton and a buss ride back to the Headquarters building seemed to take an eternity. When I got off the bus I could not see my family, I ran through the building, around the building until finally I found them.
Meeting my Wife and children,
One for the first time.
After six months deployed.
Places some would describe as hell.
Peace, Joy.
Be well and happy!
Jordan
22.12.06
Iraq
After leaving South East Asia and making for the Persian Gulf the MSSG disembarked in Kuwait. After a short time there we headed directly to an Army Forward Operating Base just south of Baghdad.
Not having a “job” to do there as my mission was being fulfilled by higher headquarters I worked as an “Watch Chief “ in the Combat Service Support Operations Center”, a very fancy name for a dispatcher of trucks and supplies. Little sleep, the best food I had had on the deployment, fear of mortars, escorting a high profile detainee, and occasional gunfire were the only things that were noteworthy for me. The MEU did a lot of great things over there though.
"During that period, the 15th MEU conducted security checkpoints, completed numerous raids, captured key high-value targets and gained the trust of the Iraqi citizens by providing medical and dental care at local schools."
Be well and happy!
Gassho
Jordan
Not having a “job” to do there as my mission was being fulfilled by higher headquarters I worked as an “Watch Chief “ in the Combat Service Support Operations Center”, a very fancy name for a dispatcher of trucks and supplies. Little sleep, the best food I had had on the deployment, fear of mortars, escorting a high profile detainee, and occasional gunfire were the only things that were noteworthy for me. The MEU did a lot of great things over there though.
"During that period, the 15th MEU conducted security checkpoints, completed numerous raids, captured key high-value targets and gained the trust of the Iraqi citizens by providing medical and dental care at local schools."
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Be well and happy!
Gassho
Jordan
15.12.06
Tsunami
In December of 2004 I left my pregnant wife and two-year-old daughter behind to deploy with the 15th MEU. We sailed from San Diego to Hawaii, and from Hawaii to Guam. As we laid anchor in Guam disaster struck. A Tsunami had washed over several coastal areas in South East Asia. After a four-hour re-supply we made for Sumatra, Indonesia and southern Sri Lanka.
Imagery of the destruction came to us over the Internet; plans were formed on how we could help. Negotiations were made with the governments as to how many people we could send ashore.
I was running on the flight deck when I saw the first casualty of the tsunami. I felt a strange emotion come over me that I had not felt since a child. Empathy, compassion things the angry demon I was did not recognize. I felt for this victim, did he have family? Did he leave behind children? Was he Married?
For the first time in my life I recognized the First Noble Truth.
My part in the relief efforts were small.
Just a Marine in a line passing supplies.
But the effects of just being there will last a lifetime.
I became a human being.
More later.
Be well and happy
Jordan
Imagery of the destruction came to us over the Internet; plans were formed on how we could help. Negotiations were made with the governments as to how many people we could send ashore.
I was running on the flight deck when I saw the first casualty of the tsunami. I felt a strange emotion come over me that I had not felt since a child. Empathy, compassion things the angry demon I was did not recognize. I felt for this victim, did he have family? Did he leave behind children? Was he Married?
For the first time in my life I recognized the First Noble Truth.
My part in the relief efforts were small.
Just a Marine in a line passing supplies.
But the effects of just being there will last a lifetime.
I became a human being.
More later.
Be well and happy
Jordan
13.12.06
Middle Background
I was sixteen. I shaved my head and had decided to join the Marines. Early influences here were likely a pair of grand uncles whom I worshipped, and to many war movies on television. I had a need to show a change, to myself and to my family. I called the Marine Corps recruiting office and was told they would not accept me as I was too young and was not on track to graduate high school with my senior class. I redoubled my efforts on my schoolwork, and began studying for the Marines. General orders, the code of conduct, rank structure, excreta. I graduated high school on time and four months later was at Marine Corps recruit Depot San Diego. Boot camp was not as challenging as I thought it would be, but there was a war on and I was ready to serve. On training day ten of Marine Combat Training my heart was shook. The war had ended and I ended up a cook. Not only had I lost my chance at redemption by going to war and being a “Hero”, I was made a “basic burger burner.” I was devastated. Picking myself back up took time. I became nihilistic. Getting Tattoos and drinking myself into a stupor when ever I could. On duty, I would excel as a Marine. I continued to study doctrine; the way of the warrior was still in my heart. This led me into studying everything from the Small Wars Manuel to Sun Tsu to Musashi.
Musashi had a profound effect on me. I harbored a desire to go to Japan. I requested orders to get overseas as soon as I was eligible. Within a few short months I was there. I quickly linked up with a friend from stateside and forgot all about Musashi for the time being. I fell in love with Japan and met my current wife. Visited Castles and temples and mountains and Shinto shrines. My warrior spirit rested, I got physically soft, mentally lazy. Having extended once in Japan I was not allowed to stay any longer. I got orders to Parris Island, often called “the land that god forgot.” Past performance saw me promoted to Staff Sergeant in May of 1999. Only eight years after I had went to boot camp. Shortly after that promotion I received orders to recruiting duty and after a successful but loathed tour there I went back to Camp Pendleton.
After nearly eleven years of trying to get out of Food service I finally got a break.
I was able to get a “high speed” job in the Communications field. I knew nothing about it. After a short class in how to do this job I was assigned to Marine Expeditionary Unit Service Support Group 15 (MSSG-15) and I started to go back to embracing my warrior heart. I had a lot of work to do. Reading Musashi again, I found myself attracted to a different character in the book, Takuan Soho, A Rinzai Monk. I began studding Buddhism again with vigor. Starting with The D.T. Suzuki books, moving on to Shunryu SuZuki, Uchiyama, and eventually Master Dogen. But I still did not “get it.”
More later
Be well and happy
Jordan
Musashi had a profound effect on me. I harbored a desire to go to Japan. I requested orders to get overseas as soon as I was eligible. Within a few short months I was there. I quickly linked up with a friend from stateside and forgot all about Musashi for the time being. I fell in love with Japan and met my current wife. Visited Castles and temples and mountains and Shinto shrines. My warrior spirit rested, I got physically soft, mentally lazy. Having extended once in Japan I was not allowed to stay any longer. I got orders to Parris Island, often called “the land that god forgot.” Past performance saw me promoted to Staff Sergeant in May of 1999. Only eight years after I had went to boot camp. Shortly after that promotion I received orders to recruiting duty and after a successful but loathed tour there I went back to Camp Pendleton.
After nearly eleven years of trying to get out of Food service I finally got a break.
I was able to get a “high speed” job in the Communications field. I knew nothing about it. After a short class in how to do this job I was assigned to Marine Expeditionary Unit Service Support Group 15 (MSSG-15) and I started to go back to embracing my warrior heart. I had a lot of work to do. Reading Musashi again, I found myself attracted to a different character in the book, Takuan Soho, A Rinzai Monk. I began studding Buddhism again with vigor. Starting with The D.T. Suzuki books, moving on to Shunryu SuZuki, Uchiyama, and eventually Master Dogen. But I still did not “get it.”
More later
Be well and happy
Jordan
12.12.06
Early Background
We all have things that affect us, that have brought us to where we are here and now. This is far from being a thorough autobiography, just a highlights real.
When I was a child, my father had a little statue of a meditating Buddha in a terrarium.
I was fascinated by it. Drawn to it. I wanted to understand who, what, where, and why it was. I held to the picture of this in my head until I was old enough to read. When I had learned how to read I went from the Cat In The Hat to the Dhammapada. My mother even made me a cushion to sit on.
I knew it was important. But I did not understand it. How could I? I had a relatively comfortable life. What was suffering? What was attachment? What were Greed, anger, and delusion?
My father encouraged this study though and eventually I read “Zen and the art of motorcycle maintenance”
I really did not get it. Not grasping the core concepts by the time I was a teenager I moved on. I examined other ancient religions and even explored some aspects of Christianity. Going so far to be confirmed as a Lutheran. This did not hold with my undisciplined mind very long either and soon I began to experience suffering without even knowing it. I embraced the “burnouts” and dead ender’s who had no beliefs but chasing after their next pleasure. I now think of this point in space in time as my life as a hungry ghost.
Always wanting more. More pleasure, more friends, more money, more to drink, more girls, more music, more, more, more, more. Never being fulfilled. This time caused a lot of trouble for my parents and I. Eventually, and luckily, I got caught doing something stupid. I had to change my paradigm. I resolved to clean myself up.
More later.
Be well and happy
Jordan
When I was a child, my father had a little statue of a meditating Buddha in a terrarium.
I was fascinated by it. Drawn to it. I wanted to understand who, what, where, and why it was. I held to the picture of this in my head until I was old enough to read. When I had learned how to read I went from the Cat In The Hat to the Dhammapada. My mother even made me a cushion to sit on.
I knew it was important. But I did not understand it. How could I? I had a relatively comfortable life. What was suffering? What was attachment? What were Greed, anger, and delusion?
My father encouraged this study though and eventually I read “Zen and the art of motorcycle maintenance”
I really did not get it. Not grasping the core concepts by the time I was a teenager I moved on. I examined other ancient religions and even explored some aspects of Christianity. Going so far to be confirmed as a Lutheran. This did not hold with my undisciplined mind very long either and soon I began to experience suffering without even knowing it. I embraced the “burnouts” and dead ender’s who had no beliefs but chasing after their next pleasure. I now think of this point in space in time as my life as a hungry ghost.
Always wanting more. More pleasure, more friends, more money, more to drink, more girls, more music, more, more, more, more. Never being fulfilled. This time caused a lot of trouble for my parents and I. Eventually, and luckily, I got caught doing something stupid. I had to change my paradigm. I resolved to clean myself up.
More later.
Be well and happy
Jordan
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