Stupid Good Intentions

The other day I went to the Kadena Base Exchange.  (That's airdale talk for PX.)
From what I have heard it is the jewel of the pacific as far as exchanges go.

For me it is a nexus point of greed, anger, and delusion....  So normally I try to stay away from it, but it was the beginning of a long weekend, so of course the girls wanted to go drag daddy out shopping.  Apparently those strange creatures think that sort of thing is fun.

Sooooooo~ anyway The Wife was looking at warpaint and I was tasked with looking for some mundane stuff (the stuff I'm OK with) when something caught the eye that started up the stupid factory that exists between my ears.  It was a cat toy.  Just a package of little pieces of plastic that literally look like something you would discard after removing from a milk container.  I knew the cat would love that stuff because trash is the best toy ever.  So my metta practice kicked on and with ninja like swiftness the trash was in the basket and whatever menial tasker I was assigned by the wife was promptly forgotten...  Which winded up causing me to spend more time, and money, in the land of greed anger and delusion....

The shopping bags stayed in the car until last night.  Then the cat toys came out...  And I was spot on, the cat loves them.  And he had a great time dispersing them about the house in a manor so quick he would make Chuck Norris have to do a double take.

0400 this morning, just a little before I get up anyway (except todays a day off) the cat is making an awful racket, a death curdling sound that would wrench even the most battle hardened veterans heart.

And he was making this sound from on top of my chest, while looking right down on me...

Ok, get up. check.  Go downstairs. check. food check water check. litter box clean check.
The cat is looking at me like I am the dumbest guy on earth.

The toys, are all gone. Of course that dispersion of these trash like objects found them going under things like the stove, couch, other heavy furniture. The cat could not get to them, therefore he thinks it is my job to.   Nope, I don't think so partner.  you screwed that one up, your on your own....  Time for me to go sit some zazen...  Robe, chant, bell bell bell, sway from side to side, breath out, think non thinking, MEROWWWWWWWWWWWW...  MEROWWWWWWWWWWWW...   Oh crap.  MEROWWWWWWWWWWWW...That cat is in pain.  MEROWWWWWWWWWWWW...   I better go check it out.  MEROWWWWWWWWWWWW...  I know that sound.  I had a sick cat that made that sound.  MEROWWWWWWWWWWWW...  Ok I'm up.  MEROWWWWWWWWWWWW...  Where is he? MEROWWWWWWWWWWWW...  Downstairs, ok there you are.   MEROWWWWWWWWWWWW... Ok I'll move the couch...  Theres your toy.  Try not to lose it again.

This is what I get for my good intentions.  There is a lesson there, it is not: don't do nice things.  It's more like when you do nice things be prepared for that deed to have unintended consequences, I got off easy this time.


oxeye said...

Jordan: The only reason cats tolerate humans at all is because they are useful at fetching things. Know your place in the Universe.

Sean said...

The stupid factory between my own ears loves that story, Jordan.

It also wants to respond with a story: I once had a pet rock. It ran away, after I tossed it into the field by my parents' house. I held on to the box, for a few days, hoping it would come back, and I searched for it, halfheartedly, in among the rest of the rocks in that field. I guess it found its freedom in the wide open, never to return to the confines of Pet Rockdom again. It must've been a clever rock. I can't say it resembled its owner, in that, but oh well. Maybe it's found its way to nirvana, by now. It seemed to have the non-indulgence thing down, pretty well, come to think of it.

SlowZen said...

Yeah, I have to keep learning that lesson over and over again...


I got a story for your story. When I first came into the Marine Corps, we did not have name tags on our camies, a much maligned custom we picked up after the first gulf war due to Army Officers complaining..... So when an NCO or SNCO wanted to get a piece of you he would demand you present your ID card so he could get proper identification, and generally use that info to tale to your First Sergeant... If you happened to forget your ID card. He would have you pick up a rock and write your name on it, then put it in your pocket. Ahh the good ole days...

luke.jmo said...

Hey Gunny - I came upon your blog through the Military Sangha Blog. I'm a LCpl in the reserves and just started a group on Facebook for Buddhists in the military. It's just me so far- I did only start it a few hours ago - but if you'd like to join, or if you know any other Buddhists out there who'd be interested, you can find the group under "Buddhists in the Armed Forces".

SlowZen said...

Hi Luke,
Thanks. I joined the group, no telling how many others will. It can be difficult for folks to identify themselves as "Buddhist." And that is OK.

It would be nice to have more support out there for those who are interested in the Dharma though. And I think facebook may be a passable vehicle for some folks to connect and enjoy the treasure of Sangha while serving. On the other hand, there are a lot of guys living in the barracks with no computer, or computer skills, I would like to think that maybe the efforts of those who connect on facebook can bring the Sangha to those folks too.

Anonymous said...

Ahhh, good old Kadena. The memories I have of Oki are....best left as memories. I was on Courteny. That was the cat's original face...completely and wholly "cat".

Anonymous said...

Documentaries, videos, ebooks, texts and news related to permaculture, sustainable design, gardening, ecovillages, nature, indigenous people, animal rights,activism, (alter)globalization, ecology and health.


Molly said...

Greed, anger, delusion? Nope. that had me smiling from my belling. Thanks for your comical foray into the world of plastic cat toys. Good stuff, Jordan.

SlowZen said...

Hey anon @Friday, June 11, 2010 6:34:00 PM
Thanks for visiting.

Anon @ Friday, June 11, 2010 11:27:00 PM

Nice website, but not so much for the vector were on here. First look inward. Then we can expand that view. If we (I) don't go in that order we (I) tend to screw everything up. But if enough people wake up I think that there will be a global shift. And I am seeing signs of more and more people beginning to rub the sleep out of their eyes....

Thanks for stopping in and sharing the laughter!

Chong Go Sunim said...

Hi Jordon,
Great story! You don't happen to have a photo of that toy, do you? My cats seem to have an attention span problem with whatever I find for them. Though I do recognize the meowing, here it's "I'm hungry and not shutting up until you feed me."

On a tangent, I take care of services and Dharma talks on a couple of Korean army bases. Here's a link to some photos I took for the Buddha's Birthday.


with palms together,
Chong Go

SlowZen said...

Hi Chong Go,
I do not have a picture but If I remember I'll snap one and update the post with it.

with fingers on the keyboard,

Thanks for looking!